Misconception # 1: It is not civilized to have more than one wife at a time.Reply: The only religious book that says: “? then marry only once” is the
Quran, the holy book of the Muslims. This injunction is not found in the
Christian Bible, in the Hindu Geeta, or in the Jewish holy book etc. In the
Bible there are so many references to various prophets and kings who had
numerous wives. Abraham had three wives, while King Solomon had seven
hundred wives, etc. In the Hindu literature the various gods have hundreds
of wives and concubines. Krishna had one thousand women. Similarly, the Jews used to marry more than once as late as the 1950s. None of these faiths regulated the number of wives a man could have at a time. Only Islam limits the wives to four.

The monogamy that the Christians, the Hindus, and Jews practice today, is
not from their religion, but from their government. So it has no religious
significance; it is a man-made rule. Monogamy was the result of an act of
parliament, not their faith. Example: The Indian Parliament in 1954 passed
the Hindu Marriage Act prohibiting the Hindu male from taking up more than
one wife. The Jewish Rabbis in the 10th Century AD made monogamy a rule.
Similarly, the European countries and the American government passed laws to make monogamy the rule in their lands.

In Surah Nissah God allows a Muslim to marry, one, two, three or four women
as long as he can do justice between them. If the man can’t do justice, the
exhortation for him is: “? then marry only once”.

Marrying more than once is not compulsory, but only an option to tide over
unique circumstances that societies face from time to time. You will find in
many societies today that the ratio between females and males is not 50:50.
There are more females than men in Europe, USA and elsewhere. On the other
hand, in India, because of the rampant female fetus abortions, the number of
females is dropping, and a crisis is in the making, as not enough number of
females will be available for Hindu men to marry a few years from now.

The option for women in countries with a bigger female ratio than men is to
share a husband with another woman, to remain single, or to become public
property. “Become public property” is a decent phrase I’m using for what it
really means. Ask any woman who cannot find an unmarried man to marry, if it
is a better choice to share a husband with another woman, or to become a
mere mistress. As a lawfully wedded wife she will get the same right as the
first wife, get legal status for herself and her children, get inheritance
rights for herself and her children, and most importantly, get respect and
dignity. Becoming a mistress is no choice. In the West becoming a mistress
or a girlfriend is no problem, but becoming a second wife is totally
unacceptable. The Government will come after you, the society will come
after you?

Misconception # 2: There is no equality between genders in Islam,
as Islam gives men the right to have more than one wife, but does it not give the
same right to women to have more than one husband.

Reply: Islam does not approve of polyandry, i.e., a woman taking up more
than one husband. It is the male whose children the women bear. If a woman
had multiple husbands, it would not be easy to know who is the father of the
child. When a child is conceived, God puts love and affection in the hearts
of the parents so that they can bring up the child. Without this love, life
cannot be sustained. But if there were dispute about who really has fathered
the child, there would be no love in the heart of the fathers. Psychologists
say that children who grow up without knowing who their father is, are
lacking in stability and maturity. Now because of scientific progress in DNA
testing, one can say who the father is; but these tests were not available
for mankind till now. Islam is about peace in the family, not discord.

Misconception # 3: Islam subjugates women in a veil.

Reply: If you look at history, to ancient civilizations, you will find that
women were the oppressed people. They had no individual merit. The
Babylonians used to punish the woman for her husband’s mistakes. The ancient Egyptians did the same. Ancient Arabs buried their newly-born daughters.

It was Islam that uplifted the status of women. It gave women rights they
never had before. Surah Nissah exhorts believing men to lower their gaze if
a lady is passing by. Similarly, there are exhortations for women to lower
their gaze if strange men are around. The Quran also speaks about the hijab
for men and women to protect the modesty. The hijab for men is to cover
their bodies minimally from their navel to the knees. The hijab for women is
to cover their whole bodies except for their faces and hands below their
wrists. There are descriptions for a female hijab. that is should cover the
endowments including head, not be tight, not be transparent, not be like the
clothes of non-believers, and not be like the clothes of the other gender,
etc.

Let me ask you a question: Suppose two identical twin sisters are walking
down a street, and one of them is dressed in revealing clothing, while the
other one is wearing a hijab. Who will the boys in the street whistle at or
tease: the one who is scantily dressed in a mini-skirt, or the one who is
modestly attired? The answer is obvious. The hijab is designed to prevent
women from being molested. It brings peace to society and prevents mischief.

Misconception # 4: Capital punishment is barbaric.Reply: There are crimes for which Islam prescribes capital punishment, eg.
for rape, murder etc. This is to protect society from criminals and
anti-social elements. In USA there are 2713 rapes taking place every day. In
Islam, the penalty is to award the death penalty so that the criminal is not
around to repeat this crime, and to teach others a lesson. Americans say
that this is a severe punishment. They say that the rapist must be put in
jail for the first rape. If later he rapes again, then it is ok to put him
to death. Friends, statistics in USA shows that 95 percent of the rapists,
after release from jail, rape again. Islam prevents this second rape.
Following the Hijib dress code prevents the rapist from temptation to rape.

Misconception # 5: Islam was spread by the sword.
Reply: Nothing is far from the truth. Islam was spread by traders who served
as excellent role models. In the book: Islam at cross-roads, the author on
page 8 says that this belief is a myth. Look at the number of Coptic
Christians in Egypt. They number 14 million. Couldn’t the Arabs have wiped
them out and converted them to Islam? Look at India. In the 1000 years that
the Muslims ruled over this subcontinent, every one could have been
forcefully converted to Islam. How can you explain that there are 800
million Hindus and others still in India? Which Muslim army went to
Indonesia and Malaysia to convert them? These people converted by seeing the good behaviors of the Muslim/Arab traders. Readers’ Digest says that between 1943 and 1984, a period of 50 years, saw more conversion to Islam in Europe and USA than to any faith. I am asking you, who went with a sword to convert these people to Islam? The sword of the intellect converts people.
If Islam is the best religion, why are many of the Muslims dishonest,
unreliable, and involved in activities such as cheating, bribing, dealing in
drugs, etc.?

1. Media maligns Islam

a. Islam is without doubt the best religion but the media is in the hands of
the westerners who are afraid of Islam. The media is continuously
broadcasting and printing information against Islam. They either provide
misinformation about Islam, misquote Islam or project a point out of
proportion, if any.

b. When any bomb blasts take place anywhere, the first people to be accused
without proof are invariably the Muslims. This appears as headlines in the
news. Later, when they find that non-Muslims were responsible, it appears as
an insignificant news’ item.

c. If a 50 year old Muslim marries a 15 year old girl after taking her
permission, it appears on the front page but when a 50 year old non-Muslim
rapes a 6 year old girl, it may appear in the news in the inside pages as
‘Newsbriefs’. Everyday in America on an average 2,713 cases of rape take
place but it doesn’t appear in the news, since it has become a way of life
for the Americans.

2. Black sheep in every community:

I am aware that there are some Muslims who are dishonest, unreliable, who
cheat, etc. but the media projects this as though only Muslims are involved
in such activities. There are black sheep in every community. I know Muslims
who are alcoholics and who can drink most of the non-Muslims under the
table.

3. Muslims best as a whole:

Inspite of all the black sheep in the Muslim community, Muslims taken on the
whole, yet form the best community in the world. We are the biggest
community of tee-totallers as a whole, i.e. those who don’t imbibe alcohol.
Collectively, we are a community which gives the maximum charity in the
world. There is not a single person in the world who can even show a candle
to the Muslims where modesty is concerned; where sobriety is concerned;
where human values and ethics are concerned.

4. Don’t judge a car by its driver:

If you want to judge how good is the latest model of the
“Mercedes” car and a person who does not know how to drive sits at
the steering wheel and
bangs up the car, who will you blame? The car or the driver? But naturally,
the driver. To analyze how good the car is, a person should not look at the
driver but see the ability and features of the car. How fast is it, what is
its average fuel consumption, what are the safety measures, etc. Even if I
agree for the sake of argument that the Muslims are bad, we can’t judge
Islam by its followers? If you want to judge how good Islam is then judge it according to its authentic sources, i.e. the Glorious Qur’an an

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